Saturday, May 28, 2011

++

We all have that time when we want to lock ourself in the room, lay on the floor, listen to the music & cry 'til we have no tears left. #SLT
SocialOomph • 28/05/2011 00:30

Words!!

Friday, May 27, 2011

++

Whenever I have a problem, I just sing. Then I realize my voice is worse than my problem.
Twuffer • 27/05/2011 21:05

Jom karok :D

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Thursday, May 26, 2011

++i miss my 'insert the name'

I miss my sister.
Every night, at 10:00 or so, she used to call me on the phone,
and when I asked her why...
She'd tell me that her body told her... She wanted to hear my voice.
"I miss my sister.
"The smell of her shampoo.
"The way she could always convince me to read her another book."
"When you love someone like I loved her, they're a part of you.
"It's like you're attached by this invisible tether,
"and no matter how far away you are, you can always feel them.
"And now, every time I reach for that tether,
"I know there's no one on the other end, and I feel like I'm falling into nothingness.
"Then I remember Jean.
"I remember a life led with no enemies, no resentments, no regrets...
and I'm inspired... to get up out of bed and go on.
"I miss my sister so much.
"It feels like a piece of me has been ripped off.
"Just one more time, I want to hold her.
"Ten more seconds... is that too much to ask?
"For ten more seconds to hold her?
"But I can't and I won't,
"and the only thing keeping me from being swallowed whole by sadness
"is that Jean would kill me if I did.
"So, for now, I'm just going to miss her.
"I love you, Jeanie.
Rest in peace."

-from glee season2 episode21-

*replace my sister with someone dear, and u know what i meant.

Monday, May 23, 2011

++greys anatomy 722

thanx for the wrap-up meredith, saje nak menambah sayu dihati has1fah?

I'd always said that I'll be happy here all alone.
I'd have my work, my friends.
But someone in your life all the time?
More trouble than it's worth.
Apparently, I got over it.
There's a reason I said I'd be happy alone.
It wasn't 'cause I thought I'd be happy alone.
It was because I thought if I loved someone...
And then it fell apart...
I might not make it.
It's easier to be alone.
Because what if you learn that you need love...
And then you don't have it?
What if you like it and lean on it?
What if you shape your life around it...
And then...
It falls apart?
Can you even survive that kind of pain?
Losing love is like organ damage.
It's like dying.
The only difference is... Death ends.
This?
It could go on forever.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

++

Have you ever found your old journal/old emails/etc & looked through it thinking, "Wow, was I dumb..."?
Twuffer • 22/05/2011 10:30

Friday, May 20, 2011

++After a year

adapt or die
(from greys anatomy)
and that's how i see it.
its been a year. and trust me, there was never any easy day for me.
i might went out having fun, laughout loud and scream 'free!!!'
but then, at the end of the day, i'll go back home, missing him and end up crying alone in my sleep.
people were like 'oh has1fah, move on already!!!'
scream all u want.
my mind was saying 'avoid seeing him or them'
but my heart refused. on my defense, unconsciously.
yea i know, disitu salah aku. and, i'm getting tired of hearing people judging.
and i know for sure, that is, just equally (if not greater) as much as people hate it to hear me when i never failed to cry after seeing him with/without them.
i know, i know. ive been getting all the hints and yet, i still didnot avoid him at all. i didnot stop the smses, the calls, the IMs, the emails, the meetings..
i know he'll stop if i had stopped replying (or starting). but i didnot.
yea i know, salah aku.. when i didnot removed all the pictures already.
not in the world wide web, not off the walls too.
yea i know, salah aku..

i told myself to just adapt, instead of dying.
dying, literally, not as in korek lubang kubur and went dead.
but dying as in terminating all the single sources leading me to him.
cutting friends, maybe little by little..
burn all the pictures and memories.
deactivate facebook account?
but, i chose adapt.
adapt to the situation, literally, becoming less and less prone to the sensitiveness and cloudy eyes when surrounded by the people asking when is your turn?
or 'u guys bila lagi?'s questions when they were discussing about their pregnant woman (i cant believe his fren is actually asking me that? i choked tatau nak jawab ape, man, u? of all the people??)
or are u guys back together?
i'll just adapt, and then, one day, i'm gonna be fine.

sumpah!
or no.
wallahualam.

adapt or die?*

*and i dont want any advice/s.
currently listening to:whataya want from me
currently feeling:sad
i wanna be:a supermodel

Thursday, May 19, 2011

++Nagai Aida

oh bederai ayor mate ku dgr semula lagu2 lama..

feat ayumi, this one.

Nagai aida matasete gomen
Mata kyuu ni shigoto ga haitta
Itsumo issho ni irarenakute
Sabishii omoi wo saseta ne

Aenai toki juwaki kara kikoeru
Kimi no koe ga kasureteru
Hisashiburi ni atta toki no
Kimi no egao ga mune wo saratte iku

Kizuita no anata ga konna ni mune no naka ni iru koto
Aishiteru masaka ne sonna koto ienai

Anata no sono kotoba dake wo shinjite
Kyou made matte ita watashi
Egao dake wa wasurenai you ni
Anata no soba ni itai kara

Waratteru anata no soba dewa sunao ni nareru no
Aishiteru demo masaka ne sonna koto ienai

Kizuita no anata ga konna ni mune no naka ni iru koto
Aishiteru masaka ne sonna koto ienai
Waratteru anata no soba dewa sunao ni nareru no
Aishiteru demo masaka ne sonna koto ienai

Kizuita no anata ga konna ni mune no naka ni iru koto
Aishiteru masaka ne sonna koto ienai
Waratteru anata no soba dewa sunao ni nareru no
Aishiteru demo masaka ne sonna koto ienai

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

++thunder

Thunder only happens when its raining
Players only love you when theyre playing
I say
Women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean youll know..

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

++

Kasihku sinar tanpa cinta
Sinarnya tanpa asmara

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Monday, May 16, 2011

++

“@ihatequotes: Letting go is not the hardest, not having them around afterwards is the one that tortures you. #saturdayromance”
Twitter for iPhone • 07/05/2011 20:40

Saturday, May 14, 2011

++

U know sometimes u play a game even when u know u're gonna lose.
Or sometimes u leave a game even when u know u can win

-from prada to nada-

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++somewhere only we know

Oh simple thing whr hv u gone?
Im getting old and i need something to rely on
So tell me when youre gonna let me in
Im getting tired and i need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why dont we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why dont we go
Somewhere only we know??



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Thursday, May 12, 2011

++Lelaki ber-string (Back For Good cover)

oh man! again, who can resist a guy with guitar?
oh how i miss video calling on ym/skype :(


Unaware but underlined I figured out this story
It wasn't good
But in the corner of my mind I celebrated glory
But that was not to be
In the twist of separation you excelled at being free
Can't you find a little room inside for me

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

++the one with ciskek

..tak jadi :(
sedih :(

base: made of digestive biscuits..

sapuan adunan cheese filling diatas base...

pastu, dah masak, dan tajadi :((((( uwaaaaaa

terpaksakah dibuang ini semua????

currently listening to:langit ke7
currently feeling:sedih :(
i wanna be:a supermodel

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

++the one with big appetite

hari ini guek puasa.
mcm biase, hari2 puase, keinginan memakan bendasing (selain nasi) adalah sangat peak.
selain ter'melibat'kan diri membeli deal ini drpd mydeal.com.my...
guek juga tak tertahan hati melihat gamba2 makanan di google.
salah satu perkara penting yg ingin saya rasai.. (selain macaroon (kurungan berganda: pernah try macaroon, tapi dah lupe dah rase dia cemane, boleh?))
perkara tersebut ialah churros:
saya mesti pilih! how how? gaji dah tinggal celah gigi nihhh :(

gambar churros courtesy of google.com




currently listening to:nothing on u
currently feeling:sad :(
i wanna be:a supermodel

Monday, May 9, 2011

++from prada to nada

i blame isteri rooney fan again for bringing me un-concentrated on works and kept thinking of watching the movie she recommended!
guek benci dikaukkkk!!!

but anyway, i cannot tahan myself, so i watched jugakla sedikit demi sedikit just now and guess what i've heard at the 11th minute?

00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:26,184
Okay.
00:11:27,144 --> 00:11:28,687
So, you're poor.
00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:31,731
No more shopping.
00:11:33,109 --> 00:11:34,442
I'd kill myself.
00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:36,486
No high-protein diet.
00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:39,239
Poor people only eat carbs.
00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:40,907
Wow.

WORDS!!!
thats what i think too. hahaha. satu lagi alasan keji susah gile nak kurus kan!
i mean, seriously, why are the carbs cheaper than those salads or salmon or code fish or *insert delicious but expensive diet food here*..
normally, they came with a smaller portion too, obviously if ure on diet whats the point to serve a big portion of expensive meal pon kan,
but, we, the fat-fat girls always think differently. we thought, heyy, we can buy 4 standard pack (lengkap dgn ayam goreng) of nasik lemak with that amount of money yow! and that'll be likely the amount of lunch for 4 days in a row instead of one day. :(

mmg byk alasan!

but urm,
today i had the yearly medical checkup.
and i lost 2kg since lastyear!
ahahahhahahahhaha sounds really desperate, but, oh my godness every grams count in my life diction!

happy.
currently listening to:from prada to nada
currently feeling:happy
i wanna be:a supermodel

Friday, May 6, 2011

++how do u fake it?

The problem with love is, it cant be forced nor stopped.
It comes naturally.
What i dont understand is how people manage to fake it. How did they pretend to love u when all they ever felt was annoyance.
Not that i didnot gave it a try, but the feeling is killing me, i felt like smashing up his face, semua benda rasa sgt memualkan!
Dan, dan dont let me start about being dramatic.
Sekecil2 keegoan or kepoyoan pon boleh buat aku nak termontah.

Tell me how?
Tell how u did it?

how do u pretend to be in love with someone u r not?

currently listening to:langit ke tujuh
currently feeling:nak temontahhh
i wanna be:a supermodel

Thursday, May 5, 2011

++alhamdulillah 3rd part

alhamdulillah, received the letter. syukran Allah!

this time around, a year ago, i received a heartache.
broke up with mr xyz, and then the company didnot converting me, merely at the same week.
i was a mess. imagine suffering heartbroken, and received the sad news about the work.
thats why i always mentioned the humdrum of 2010. bad luck year!
i started unforeseen regime. hang out with the old shaitans. and also became prejudice of all the people all the way thru.
most of the time, i choose not to go out. i was feeling down and feeling really2 small, and insecure and in-confident. those sinking days.

yesterday, when i received the letter (altho expected)
i felt like a small child again. i felt like walking on the cloud when i took the lift down from level 17.
i would have hug anybody, god i am shy. so i hug u.
nasibaik gaji dah habis, ifnot, i would belanja all the people walking on the street that time. hehe.

and so the journey to find the right place to buy has begin.
oh my, it was such a hard time.
one place is cozy, the price is shit. another one is cheap, but it was in the middle of hawker's stalls. pening kepala.

and i have the low budget of 250k loan amount approval only. aiyark. slowing down the whole processes.

currently listening to:jessie j feat bob - pricetag
currently feeling:happy
i wanna be:a supermodel

Monday, May 2, 2011

++

No matter how painful someone is hurting you, sometimes letting them go hurts even worse. #ihatequotes
CoTweet • 02/05/2011 00:00

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Sunday, May 1, 2011

++

Sometimes, no matter how much you miss someone, you can't do anything about it 'cause in your absence he found his happiness. #ihatequotes
CoTweet • 30/04/2011 19:30
retweeted by @videlcute

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