++Kosong

Tubuhku ada di sini
Tetapi tidak jiwaku
Kosong yang hanya kurasakan
Kau telah tinggal di hatiku



Kamu seperti hantu
Terus menghantuiku
Ke mana pun tubuhku pergi
Kau terus membayangi aku

Salahku biarkan kamu
Bermain dengan hatiku
Aku tak bisa memusnahkan
Kau dari pikiranku ini

Di dalam keramaian aku masih merasa sepi
Sendiri memikirkan kamu
Kau genggam hatiku
Dan kau tuliskan namamu
Kau tulis namamu

Tubuhku ada di sini
Tetapi tidak jiwaku
Kosong yang hanya kurasakan
Kau telah tinggal di hatiku

currently listening to:dewa
currently feeling:empty
i wanna be:alive!!!

++Crumbs

And if she doesn't go your way
Look up to blue skies and say hey
It's ok it's ok



Big world
Says he wants to see the light for once,
Well maybe if you try

It's so sad
Babe don't look so sad
I've got it wrong today

And if she doesn't go your way
Look up to blue skies and say hey
It's ok it's ok

Big world
Says he wants to see the light for once,
Well maybe if you try

It's so sad
Babe don't look so sad
I've got it wrong today
Wrong today

And if she doesn't go your way
Look up to blue skies and say hey
It's ok it's ok

c/o

Big world
Says he wants to see the light for once,
Well maybe if you try

It's so sad
Babe don't look so sad
I've got it wrong today

Says he wants to see the light for once,
Well maybe if you try

It's so sad
Babe don't look so sad
I've got it wrong today

++Parachute

i love the drums.!


I don't tell anyone about the way you hold my hand
I don't tell anyone about the things that we have planned
I won't tell anybody
Won't tell anybody
They want to push me down
They want to see you fall




Won't tell anybody how you turn my world around
I won't tell anyone how your voice is my favourite sound
Won't tell anybody
Won't tell anybody
They want to see us fall
They want to see us fall

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

Don't believe the things you tell yourself so late night and
You are your own worst enemy
You'll never win the fight
Just hold onto me
I'll hold onto you
It's you and me up against the world
It's you and me

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I'll fall into you

I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I won't fall out of,
I won't fall out of love
I'll fall into you

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

currently listening to:parachute
currently feeling:need a goddemn parachute
i wanna be:a supermodel~

++the one who sesat to nilai

my mum is a walking GPS
i cannot point out which road in negeri sembil4n she didnot know.
and most of KL roads too, she can drive to my former school dgn menutop mate yow!
(the fact that we resided ssp kl for 5 years and then moved to UMkl for another almost 5years, than my bro lak dok UM for another 4years dan skrg semua keje kl, ok, wateva)
and sometimes, she is reliable bile2 aku sesat di negeri2 lain juwer. pelik tapi benar.

few days ago, i had to do some testing at the TOC at nilai. this is the first time.
before that, let me tell u that i'm a sucker at n9 maps. kpil4h yg kampung halaman tuh pon aku gagal, inikan pula nilai?
so, instead of taking the nilai exit, i cleverly exit at nilai-utara exit. which lead me to KLIA instead.
omakkkkkk, orang kek mano niiiiiiiii? so i called her.
"tah kek memano ntah niaaa, tibo2 senbod eh tulih KLIA niaaaa" i cried.

"clingg!" thats the sound of gambar jalan di area ituh, terus terpancar agaknya di kepala otak my mom.
"ooo..kek situ.. ala.. ko toghuih yo.. ko masok kiri, kek jalan yg ko eksiden dulu tu... ko ingat laie tak? dulu ko eksiden maso nak poie amek yance kek airport dulu tu"

OMAKKKKKKKK, kenape memori muh sampai ke tahap ituh?

nangis, cinta didlm hati. tidak mungkin lupa.

few days agocurrently listening to:keri hilson - knock u down
currently feeling:bad
i wanna be:kurusssssssss

++Tiger Lily-Matchbook Romance

We drive tonight
And you are by my side
We're talking about our lives
Like we've known each other forever

Time flies by
With the sound of your voice
It's close to paradise
With the end surely near

And if I could only stop the car
And hold onto you
And never let go (And never let go)
I'll never let go (I'll never let go)

As we round the corner to your house
You turn to me and said
"I'll be going through withdrawal of you
For this one night we have spent."

And I want to speak these words
But I guess i'll just bite my tongue
And accept someday, somehow
As our words that we'll hang from

And I
I don't wanna speak these words
'Cause I
I don't wanna make things any worse

Why does tonight have to end?
Why dont we hit restart
And pause it at our favorite parts
We'll skip the goodbyes

If I had it my way
I'd turn the car around
And run away
Just you and I

And I
I don't wanna speak these words
'Cause I
I don't wanna make things any worse

++Josh Radin - Closer

Nak balik!!! nak tidur atas tilam!!! nak nangis puas puas bukan sorok2 kat meja pastu kaksal bgtau kat org depan ni saye nangis.

i felt empty!!!



So, we're alone again
I wish it were over
we seem to never end
only get closer
to the point where i can take no more

the clouds in your eyes
down your face they pour
won't you be the new one burn to shine
I take the blue ones every time
walk me down your broken line
all you have to do is cry

hush my baby now
your talking is just noise and won't lay me down amongst
your toys in a room where i can take no more

the clouds in your eyes
down your face they pour
won't you be the new one burn to shine
i take the blue ones every time
walk me down your broken line
all you have to do is cry

photographs and brightly colored paper
are your mask you wear in this caper
that is our life
we walk right into the strife
and a tear from your eye brings me home

the clouds in your eyes
down your face they pour
won't you be the new one burn to shine
i take the blue ones every time
walk me down your broken line
all you have to do is cry
currently listening to:josh radin - closer
currently feeling:sad :((
i wanna be:a supermodel

++anjing pendek depan rumah

this morning i woke up
and knocked me on my face.
lasnite i felt like a 23.
yeah those days at kelanajaya.
rumah depan ade anjing pendek muke macam hush puppies.
curi2 masok balik malam malam buta, awak awak awak tidur depan tv.
i miss being loved. :((



im madly in love with u ean!!!!! i can see the tattoo on your arms beneath that tshirt!!!
and ilove your voice. suara serak-macam-selsema kind.
*turning 23 years old yet?



currently listening to:jason derulo - in my head
currently feeling:rindu :((
i wanna be:a supermodel

++after 2months

nothing much has changed since then..
i still cried almost everynite thinking of the past.
kadangkala simply by watching the glow in the dark fake stars yg masih melekat didinding bilik.
kadangkala simply by the sound of the sms ringtones.
kadangkala simply by the silly smell of the quilt cover.
the more i tried to avoid silentness, alonesomeness, the more i miss the unexistance of him.. urghhhhhhhhhh!!!
i still cried over the love songs in the radio, even more over the sad songs.
i still turned 360 to the good smell of giorgioarmani+after-smoking-cigarette-smells.. very addictive.. yet very popular, too. huhuhukkkk
sometimes, i felt like a zombie crossing the road.. mujur aku masih ada agama untuk berpegang, if not, i would die, strucked by the cars passing by. nauzubillah. im just saying. semuga iman ini tidak rapuh.

the BFFs told me that they took 6months vacation* to heal the whole process, to finally adapt being single and happy again, one of them cried intensely a few days before this entry and admitted she actually havent recovered yet! and that was like what, 1year and a half after she broke up. damn kan?
damn the breakup process! I HATE!
i hate how easy the boys can move on and being happy again..

1 thing i learn is, never love the other half 100% whole-heartedly. never ever.
and, dont be so addicted to the love. it will weaken u as strong as the marijuana.
and u can never be sober. urghh.

need BEACH VACATION immediately!
but, who cares?

*by vacation, i meant literally vacating herself from the ex. not really taking the bags off to somewhere beyond workplace.:p
currently listening to:puddle of mudd - blurry
currently feeling:pening
i wanna be:a rokstaaa

++the one who misses the worldcup2010

i think i am already MISSING the worldcup
i miss the fb status wars between penyokong2 tegar.
i miss the non-stop curse towards the poor octopus
i miss midnite hours
i miss being glued to the couch, not like i watched every single game, i almost sleep halfway of all the games actually.
i miss screaming "BODOHHHHHHHH" at 2-3-4ish AM.
i miss reading status2 perempuan2 perasan gila bola yg selame ni takde pon amek kesah pasal bola pon tapi tetibe mcm emo nak mamposss (read: aku lah tuh hehe, eh tp, aku xde penah pon buat status psl bola dlm fb)

and one thing foshore..
i HATE it
when people has started back all routines of the lovey dovey cinta kau cinta ku, thanx hunny for the lovely dinner diatas bulan dan bintang, i love u sayang, just went back to a 18 sederet movie marathon with the other half, anak aku pandai melompat katak, anak aku pandai minom beer, anak aku this anak aku that, oh dear love when r u coming back i miss u oredy, my hubby gave me a 44inch gold plated sportsrim for my 28th birthday, fucking lovely 88dozen roses delivered to my table this morning from poor 88years old husband, in love with shafik this, love u shafik that (i dunno why i came out with name shafik), but u got the drift?

urgh, i am not annoyed this time, i am purely jealous!!!
they people make me felt empty but stress at the same time, and i cant stop reading newsfeed.
let alone deleting the account.
hell i m so gonna write those words too nextyear, if not sooner. or mbe nextnextyear.
KO SABAAAAA KEJAP!!!

currently listening to:padi-menanti sebuah jawapan
currently feeling:stress
i wanna be:a supermodel

++i shut down

best break up song ever.
and the person who introduced me to this song 9years ago is the one's breaking me up.
thanx mr atuk yg kejam for seeing this coming. i didnt see this coming.



How far would I go
If I had to forget all I know
How long would I ride
If I got tired of hiding how I feel

How deep would I climb
To bury the truths I find
And how small I've become
In this burned out blazing sun
I'm broken blue

Oh I shut down
Oh I shut down

Relax, rewind (for the thousandth time)
Old movies run on in my mind (in my mind)
How hard would I fight
If I had to rewrite the old reviews

Oh I shut down
Oh I shut down
I try so hard to wash away the obvious
and shut down

And its hard to watch the windows bleed
for several reasons I can see
And all the while the air I breathe
is polluted by your psychic dreams

Oh I shut down
Oh I shut down
I try so hard to wash away the obvious
and shut down


And its hard to watch the windows bleak
for several reasons I can see
And all the while the air I breathe
is polluted by your psychic dreams
It's all compressed so easily!
We're all repressed so easily!

I shut down! I shut down! I shut down!
I shut down
I shut down

++the one with dreams

have u ever wondered what's the beginning of your dreams?
everynite we dream and the next morning we will talk to the next person
"malam tadi kan, aku mimpi kite tibe2 ade kat sini sini nih, tibe2, gitu gitu nih"
so on and so forth.
always, we wont remember what is actualyy the beginning of the dreams, tibe2 je dah ade kat tgh2 cerita mimpi kita.
tiba2 dah ade kat atas bumbung utk terjun
tibe2 tidur disebelah a guy that u cant see his face
tibe2 ade kebakaran
tibe2 terase nak teberak :D
tibe2 dah ade dlm kebanjiran
tibe2 kite tgh drive
tibe2 kite tgh jumpe perempuan yg dibenci

i love 'inception' & will definitely watch again!!!
and im in love with cillian murphy (robert fischer jr) more!!

currently listening to:juxtapose - aku ingin berlari
currently feeling:dreaming~
i wanna be:a supermodel~

++175 sing dollar?

this is really random
anyone interested in subsidizing $175 (dollar singapura) to me?
for 30seconds to mars + smashing pumpkins concert in the country below.
i'll pay the bus-ride, dan sanggop tidur ditepi jalan.

currently listening to:ungu andai kutahu
currently feeling:mahu menyanyi
i wanna be:a rokstar

++the one with the songs selection

YES! yes!
i am in the phase of listening + rewinding + reminiscing
the good, sumtimes sad, sumtimes happy but turned sad because of the memory beneath, old songs
and again, let me be!
i hope every tears dropped and dissolved into the earth is equivalent to every little memory i had about 'us'.. so i can start new and clean and didnot suddenly strike a zombie pose in the middle of a happy conversations, like what happened yesterday, and the day before, and the day before before, etc.
until when? i'll try my very best. doa kan sejjah.
if u had problems with me coping my life, with me writing sad, pathetic entries in my blog, u can go away now.

currently listening to:EMAN-I SHUT DOWN
currently feeling:pathetic
i wanna go to pokdikseng!!!

++aku sayang padamu

i love my BFFs. i hope they wont stop picking up my sappy voice calls. or reading the annoying, late night's smses. tak reply pon takpe ok. lepas sms, aku boleh tido lena.
but just, dont block my number yet.



Tahukah engkau kekasih
Apa yang selalu aku rasakan
Di saat-saat aku sedang sendiri
Selalu saja ingat padamu

Aku sayang padamu
Aku ingin dirimu
Selalu bersamaku
Aku sayang padamu

Aku sayang aku sayang padamu

Tahukah engkau kekasih
Apa yang selalu aku fikirkan
Di saat-saat aku sedang sendiri
Selalu saja memikirkanmu

Aku sayang padamu wo wow
Aku ingin dirimu
Selalu bersamaku
Aku sayang padamu

Aku sayang aku sayang padamu

Aku sayang padamu
Oh Aku sayang padamu
Aku ingin dirimu
Selalu bersamaku
Aku sayang
Aku sayang padamu

Aku sayang padamu
Aku ingin dirimu
Selalu bersamaku
Aku sayang padamu
Aku sayang aku sayang padamu

++Yang Terdalam

yeah still in pertepan's mood
i think yang terdalam is the saddest song of all. it felt like raining all the time.
doakan aku, doakan aku kuat.
:(

Yang Terdalam - feat. Iwan Fals (13/17)





Kulepas semua yang ku inginkan
Tak akan ku ulangi
Maafkan jika kau kusayangi
Dan bila kumenanti

Pernahkah engkau coba mengerti
Lihatlah ku disini
Mungkinkah jika aku bermimpi
Salahkah tuk menanti

Reff :

Takan lelah
Aku menanti
Tak hilang
Cintaku ini
Hingga saat kau tak kembali
Kan kukenang di hati saja

Kau telah tinggalkan
Hati yang terdalam
Hingga tiada cinta
Tersisa dijiwa

++semua tentang kita

peterporn indeed.
melayan lagu2nya membuatkan kita terlupakan waktu.
terbaik.

Semua Tentang Kita @ Music Special `Perjalanan Mimpi PETERPAN` (3/11)



original video:

Waktu terasa semakin berlalu
Tinggalkan cerita tentang kita
Akan tiada lagi kini tawamu
Tuk hapuskan semua sepi di hati

Ada cerita tentang aku dan dia
Dan kita bersama saat dulu kala
Ada cerita tentang masa yang indah
Saat kita berduka saat kita tertawa

Teringat di saat kita tertawa bersama
Ceritakan semua tentang kita

Ada cerita tentang aku dan dia
Dan kita bersama saat dulu kala
Ada cerita tentang masa yang indah
Saat kita berduka saat kita tertawa

++the one who is defisit again

i. should. MUST. stop. shopping. now.
this is bad, real bad. michaeljackson!

currently listening to:training
currently feeling:tensed!!!
i wanna be:rich!!!!!!!!!

++B.o.B - Airplanes ft. Hayley Williams of Paramore [Official Music Video]

[Hayley Williams - Chorus]
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, wish right now
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, Wish right now

[B.o.B - Verse 1]
Yeah
I could use a dream or a genie or a wish
To go back to a place much simpler than this
'Cause after all the partyin'
The smashin' and crashin'
And all the glitz and the glam and the fashion
And all the pandemonium and all the madness
There comes a time when you fade to the blackness
And when you're starin' at that phone in yo' lap
And hopin', but them people never call you back
But that's just how the story unfolds
You get another hand
Soon after you fold
And when your plans unravel in the sand
What would you wish for if you had one chance?
So airplanes airplanes
Sorry I'm late
I'm on my way
So don't close that gate
If I don't make that
Then I switch my flight
And I'll be right back at it
By the end of the night

[Hayley Williams - Chorus]
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, wish right now
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, wish right now

[B.o.B - Verse 2]
Yeah
Yeah
Somebody take me back to the days
Before this was a job
Before I got paid
Before it ever mattered what I had in my bank
Yeah back when I was tryin' to get a tip at Subway
And back when I was rappin' for the hell of it
But now days we rappin' to stay relevant
I'm guessin' that if we can make some wishes out of airplanes
Then maybe oh maybe I'll go back to the days
Before the politics that we call the rap game
And back when ain't nobody listened to my mistakes
And back before I tried to cover up my slate
But this is for Decatur
What's up Bobby Ray?
So can I get a wish to end the politics
And get back to the music that started this shit
So here I stand
And then again I say
I'm hopin' we can make some wishes outta airplanes

[Hayley Williams - Chorus]
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, wish right now
Can we pretend that airplanes
In the night sky
Are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now
Wish right now, wish right now

++no title yet 2

i miss
dihantar dan dijemput diofis selepas kerja.
malas siotttttt nak drive!

currently listening to:ungu-sejauh mungkin
currently feeling:sad
i wanna be:a superstar

++She has no time

Keane-She has no time
by artist
You think your days are uneventful
And no one ever thinks about you
She goes her own way
She goes her own way

You think your days are ordinary
And no one ever thinks about you
But we're all the same
And she can hardly breathe without you

She says she has no time for you now
She says she has no time

Think about the lonely people
And think about the day she found you
Or lie to yourself
And see it all dissolve around you

She says she has no time for you now
She says she has no time

Lonely people tumble downwards
My heart opens up to you
When she says she has no time for you now
She says she has no time

++facebook vs blogger

facebook is only like the surface.
blog is like a diary where I can let go of my inner feelings.. so let me be.

++3 months sober

:((((((((((((((((((((((((((

ya, sedih mode indeed.

to deal with the whole breakup thing is one thing,
to feel that yeah it is actually happening, is another one thing.

currently listening to:uni both
currently feeling:sgt sedih utter sedih
i wanna be:a supermodel

++You n i both

beautifulllll.

'that's ok, coz i'll remember everything u sang..'

++the one with the distractions

I went to ella's concert in istanabudaya just now.
I need distractions. distractions. and a wholelot of distractionsss...
but in the middle of the distractions, I tend to miss him moreeee.
babiii aaaahhhhhhhhh
babiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

pfuf lega sikit dah tulis.
ok jom tido.
currently listening to:
currently feeling:
i wanna be:

++the one with a football fan yg babun

DJ : ha apakah luahan perasaan awk ttg worldcup?
caller: saye nak luahkan perasaan gembire saye sbb england&italy tak dpt masok final worldcup ahahahhaha
DJ : awak buat semua penyokong england&italy kat sini geram tau..
caller: bukan ape abg DJ, saye gembire sbb dlm team england tuh ade pemain chelsea..hahaha
DJ : hoh? awak taksuke england sbb ade pemain chelsea..
caller: haah abg DJ..ahahaha padan muke diorg kalah, dulu mase manchester united nye goal offside bla bla bla sbb drogba bla bla bla..skrg england punye goal lak blablabla hahahaha padan muke pemain chelsea..ahahaha
DJ : awk tau tak, saye pon suke gak england kalah, sbb dlm tu ade pemain manchester united, rooney, ahahaha
caller: ahahaha saye pon tak suke rooney ahahahhaa walopon dia man u ahahaha
caller: saye taksuke semua pemain england dlm manchester united ahahaha

**does the caller even know that BPL (barclays premier leaguea) was previously known as ENGLISH premier leaguea? he should sokong club2 bukan english seperti juventus, intermilan dsb.
**dont let me start about how i hate manchester united fans.


currently listening to:
currently feeling:
i wanna be:

++Not afraid

pfuf, feel tired of watching this video, but i guess i still have the softspot for hiphop songs heheh. and i still think eminem looks like michael scotfield or michael scotfield is as brilliant as eminem. heh.


[Chorus:]
I'm not afraid (I'm not afraid)
To take a stand (to take a stand)
Everybody (everybody)
Come take my hand (come take my hand)
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just lettin you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel like you've been down the same road (same road)

[Intro (during Chorus):]
Yeah, it's been a ride
I guess I had to, go to that place, to get to this one
Now some of you, might still be in that place
If you're trying to get out, just follow me
I'll get you there

You could try and read my lyrics off of this paper before I lay 'em
But you won't take the sting out these words before I say 'em
Cause ain't no way I'ma let you stop me from causin mayhem
When I say 'em or do somethin I do it, I don't give a damn
what you think, I'm doin this for me, so fuck the world
Feed it beans, it's gassed up, if it thinks it's stoppin me
I'ma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly
And all those who look down on me I'm tearin down your balcony
No if ands or buts, don't try to ask him why or how can he
From "Infinite" down to the last "Relapse" album
he's still shittin, whether he's on salary paid hourly
Until he bows out or he shits his bowels out of him
Whichever comes first, for better or worse
He's married to the game, like a fuck you for Christmas
His gift is a curse, forget the Earth, he's got the urge
to pull his dick from the dirt, and fuck the whole universe

[Chorus]

Okay quit playin with the scissors and shit, and cut the crap
I shouldn't have to rhyme these words in the rhythm for you to know it's a rap
You said you was king, you lied through your teeth, for that
Fuck your feelings, instead of gettin crowned you're gettin capped
And to the fans, I'll never let you down again, I'm back
I promise to never go back on that promise, in fact
Let's be honest, that last "Relapse" CD was ehhh
Perhaps I ran them accents into the ground
Relax, I ain't goin back to that now
All I'm tryin to say is get back, click-clack, blaow
Cause I ain't playin around
It's a game called circle and I don't know how, I'm way too up to back down
But I think I'm still tryin to figure this crap out
Thought I had it mapped out but I guess I didn't, this fuckin black cloud
still follows, me around but it's time to exorcise these demons
These muh'fuckers are doin jumpin jacks now!

[Chorus]

And I just can't keep living this way
So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage
I'm standing up, I'ma face my demons
I'm manning up, I'ma hold my ground
I've had enough, now I'm so fed up
Time to put my life back together right now! (now)

It was my decision to get clean, I did it for me
Admittedly, I probably did it subliminally
for you, so I could come back a brand new me you helped see me through
And don't even realize what you did, believe me you
I been through the ringer, but they could do little to the middle finger
I think I got a tear in my eye, I feel like the king of
my world, haters can make like bees with no stingers
and drop dead, no more beef flingers
No more drama from now on, I promise
to focus solely on handlin my responsibilities as a father
So I solemnly swear to always treat this roof, like my daughters
and raise it, you couldn't lift a single shingle on it!
Cause the way I feel, I'm strong enough to go to the club
or the corner pub, and lift the whole liquor counter up
Cause I'm raising the bar
I'd shoot for the moon but I'm too busy gazin at stars
I feel amazing and I'm

[Chorus]